This article is a transcript of the Teen Titans Go! episode "Dude Relax" from season 1, which aired on May 14, 2013.
| Characters Robin Raven |
Locations Titans Tower Jump City |
| Song None |
Plot Point Robin tries to relax |
| This transcript is complete. |
Transcript[]
| Starfire has Silkie on her lap, Cyborg is on his computer and Raven is mediating when Robin enters the living room. | |
| Robin: | Titans go! As soon as we get an alert on my communicator. |
|---|---|
| Robin uses his grappling hook and swings to the other side of the room. Robin looks at his communicator. | |
| Robin: | Hopefully, at any moment now. |
| Beast Boy as a cat meows. Robin checks his communicator which says that the status is all good, bro! Robin hears the microwave beep. | |
| Robin: | Crime? |
| Beast Boy meows again. Beast Boy transforms back into his normal self. | |
| Beast Boy: | More like microwave popcorn. Want some? |
| Robin | Make me a bag. But remain vigilant. It must not burn. |
| Beast Boy: | Aye-aye. (softly) Weirdo. |
| Beast Boy goes inside the kitchen. Robin checks his communicator again. | |
| Cyborg: | We've gone a whole week without a crime alert. |
| Cyborg looks at Raven. | |
| Cyborg: | I think it's starting to get to him. |
| Raven: | Yeah, Robin is definitely going through mission withdrawal. |
| Starfire: | That would explain the involuntary eye movement. |
| Robin's eye starts twitching. | |
| Robin: | Titans! |
| Everyone gasps. | |
| Starfire and Raven: | What! |
| Robin: | Still nothing to report. |
| Beast Boy comes back in carrying a bowl of popcorn. | |
| Beast Boy: | Come on, dude. Chill out. |
| Starfire: | Yes, Robin. Perhaps you should take advantage of the lull in criminal activities in order to do "the relax. |
| Robin: | Relax? |
| Robin laughs nervously and starts sweating. | |
| Raven: | Uh, you do know how to relax, don't you? |
| Robin scoffs. | |
| Robin: | I can relax circles around you fools. |
| Cyborg: | Says the guy who tried to turn sleeping into a competitive sport. |
| In flashback. Robin is in pajamas looking at his watch. | |
| Robin: | On your mark, get set, sleep. |
| A whistle blows and Robin starts snoring rapidly. End of flashback. | |
| Robin: | Well, it's just as leader, I'm not used to going this long without doing something productive. But, I can totally take it easy until there's an alert. |
| Beast Boy: | Good, 'cause that's what we're gonna do. |
| The titans walk off to relax. | |
| Robin: | Ah, something happen, please! |
| Cyborg is fixing the T-car in the garage. | |
| Cyborg: | You are just the prettiest, high performance, low-emission muffler I've ever seen. Yes, you are. |
| Robin enters the garage. | |
| Robin: | Hey, Cyborg. You relaxing? |
| Cyborg drops his wrench and looks at Robin. | |
| Cyborg | (sighs) I was. |
| Robin: | Mind if I join you? |
| Cyborg: | Yes. |
| Robin: | [Starts tinkering.] Looks like we've got a lot of work ahead of us if we want this to be ready for the next mission. |
| Cyborg: | I'm just tinkering, Robin. Not trying to save the world. |
| Robin: | I bet we could rebuild this whole engine pretty quick. Knock it out in 15, 16 hours tops. |
| Robin accidentally leans on a lever which brings the car down on Cyborg and the car breaks apart. | |
| Robin: | Ooh. |
| Cyborg: | You mind relaxing somewhere else? |
| Robin leaves Cyborg and went to go visit Starfire. Robin bangs on Starfire's door. | |
| Starfire: | Enter. |
| The door slides open. | |
| Starfire: | Care to join me in the earth relaxation ritual of a spa mask? I've made mine of gorka berries, pickles and cream cheese. |
| Robin starts relaxing with Starfire. Starfire opens one eye and looks at Robin. Starfire chuckles. | |
| Starfire: | Is it not like a million little toes dancing on your face? Can you feel the invasion of your pore holes? |
| Robin: | And can you feel the alpha hydroxy acid I added to deaden our nerve endings and increase our pain tolerance for the next mission? |
| Starfire: | Acid? Is that why it feels like the little toes are dancing more vigorously? |
| Robin: | Aah, that means it's working. Phoo-phoo, feel the burn. |
| Starfire: | Oh, I am feeling the burn. And I do not like it! |
| The acid starts burning Starfire's face which causes her to scream. Starfire flies through the roof. Robin leaves Starfire's room. In Raven's room. Raven is trimming a bonsai. Robin bangs on Raven's door. Raven uses her powers to open the door. | |
| Robin: | Interesting fact about bonsai |
| Raven: | No. |
| Raven slams the door shut on Robin. | |
| Robin: | (outside of the door.) Missed a spot. |
| Outdoors, Beast Boy is playing fetch with himself . | |
| Beast Boy: | Hey, Robin. Wanna play fetch? Uh, catch. |
| Robin: | Sounds super relaxing. And an opportunity to see if my arm exercises have been working. |
| He throws the ball really fast and hard, and hits Beast Boy in the eye, knocking him out. | |
| Beast Boy: | Ouch. |
| Robin: | Your turn. Ready when you are, Beast Boy. Okay, let's go. I'm waiting. |
| The other Titans confront him in the living room and are upset that he wasn't able to relax on his own. | |
| Cyborg: | You couldn't just relax for one afternoon? |
| Robin: | You guys may not like it, but my job as leader is to always remain vigilant. |
| Moments later, the Titans finally get an alert call. | |
| Robin: | Yes, finally! Titans, go! |
| Starfire: | Take hold of your horses, Robin. You are going nowhere. |
| Beast Boy: | Yeah. You're staying here until you learn to take it easy, bro. |
| The titans aren't letting Robin go with them until he learns how to relax. | |
| Robin: | And how are you gonna stop me? |
| Cyborg: | With this. |
| Cyborg puts a shocking collar on his neck that activates and shocks him when he tries to leave the tower. | |
| Robin: | Whatever that is it's not gonna keep me from the mission... |
| Cyborg: | If you try to leave the tower, that collar will activate an electric fence. |
| Robin: | As the leader of this group, you can't tell me... |
| Raven: | This is for your own good, Robin. |
| Cyborg: | So enjoy your day off. |
| Robin: | That's very funny. Now knock it off! |
| The titans except Robin enter the elevator. | |
| Robin: | (coughs) Hey. Oh, wait for me. You really think a little shock will... |
| The elevators doors close. | |
| Robin: | So much hurt. |
| Robin thinks of how he can help the Titans while being at the Tower, so he decides to call them, but they didn't want to listen to him. | |
| Robin: | Uh-huh. I know how to help on the mission. |
| Robin calls Starfire. | |
| Robin: | Starfire, you need to build up speed for a better trajectory. |
| Starfire: | (on TV) My flying is not the problem. Bye, Robin. |
| Robin calls Raven. | |
| Robin: | Raven, maybe the... |
| Raven: | (on TV) No. |
| Robin calls Cyborg. | |
| Robin: | Cyborg, look out! |
| Cyborg gets slammed into the wall by the octopus. | |
| Cyborg: | Oh, come on. |
| Robin calls Beast Boy. | |
| Robin: | Beast Boy, go pterodactyl! Titans, focus! |
| Titans: | (on TV) Robin, chill out. |
| The titans ends the call with Robin. Beast Boy arrives at the living room to relax. | |
| Robin: | Beast Boy, what are you doing here? I thought you were at the battle. |
| Beast Boy: | Oh, right. Forgot you were home, dude. I was just gonna hang out here today. |
| Robin: | But I just saw you there. |
| Beast Boy: | Sometimes I replace myself with an animal I painted green. |
| In a flashback. | |
| Robin: | Beast Boy, help me! |
| End of flashback. | |
| Robin: | That explains a lot. I've got to figure out a way to remove this collar and get back out there. |
| Beast Boy: | Or you could just relax. |
| Robin: | I just can't for some reason. It's so easy for everyone else to just chill out. I've tried, but it just doesn't happen. I don't even know where to start. |
| Beast Boy: | Whoa! You're more uptight than I thought, dude. |
| Beast Boy decides to teach Robin how to relax. | |
| Beast Boy: | Just think of nothing and no one. Ignore all outside distractions. Here's your test. For the rest of the day, no communicator. |
| Robin: | No communicator. No problem. |
| Beast Boy: | That's a start. Now stand up. Look at it. You've barely even left a butt print on the couch. In order to truly relax, you've gotta learn to be one with the couch. |
| Robin: | Be one with the couch? |
| Beast Boy: | Just follow the master. Mmm. Aah, |
| Robin: | Okay, is there like a specific way I should hum? Like, in a minor key? (humming) Or should I go with a major? Or maybe-- |
| Beast Boy: | Shh. Let go, and be one with the couch. |
| Robin: | What? How are you doing that? |
| Beast Boy: | Just find your chill, bro. |
| He shows Robin how to have oneness with the couch, and disappears into it, and expects Robin to do the same. | |
| Robin: | Wait, I have more questions! Beast Boy, don't leave me! |
| Robin then gets a call, and Beast Boy comes back and tries to stop him from taking it. | |
| Beast Boy: | Dude, what are you doing? |
| Robin: | What if it's an emergency? |
| Beast Boy: | Ah, fine. Go answer it. |
| Robin: | It'll be quick. |
| Beast Boy: | I knew you couldn't relax for even one afternoon. |
| Failing to do so, Beast Boy said that he finally found something which he is better at than Robin. | |
| Beast Boy: | Guess we finally found something that I'm better at than you. |
| Beast Boy disappears into the couch again. | |
| Robin: | Beast Boy better at something than me? Just think of nothing and no one. Ignore all outside distractions. I will master oneness with the couch. |
| Robin wants to be better than Beast Boy at everything, and finally finds oneness with the couch. Robin becomes one with the couch and even meets The Couch spirit itself. | |
| Robin: | Woah! Who are you? |
| The Couch: | I am the couch. Tell me what it is that you seek, baby. |
| Robin: | I wish to relax, your couchness. |
| The Couch: | You have mastered the first step. But something is keeping you from truly relaxing. |
| Robin: | Yeah, it's because I'm the leader, and leaders must stay vigilant. |
| The Couch: | That is not why you cannot relax, my man. |
| Robin: | Then why? |
| The Couch: | That is something you must find out For yourself. |
| The couch spirit disappears. | |
| Robin: | Hey! Hey, where did you go? Couch! |
| In the couch, he learns the reason of why he can't relax. | |
| Robin: | The circus where I grew up. This is the last place I remember being able to really relax. Being a baby was the greatest. |
| It was because when he was at the circus as a baby, the circus animals teased him and bullied him when he let his guard down. | |
| Baby Robin: | Hey, that's mine. Give it back! It's all coming back to me. Every time I let my guard down you jerky circus animals would take my stuff. |
| The flashback disappears. | |
| Robin: | That's why I've always been so vigilant. |
| The Couch: | Indeed. [The Couch Spirit invokes that he is ill-relaxed all because a monkey stole his diaper.] All because a monkey stole your diaper. |
| Robin: | Not the reason I was expecting. |
| The Couch: | Now, take the day off and relax. The animals can't bother you anymore. |
| Robin: | You're right. They can't. |
| Learning this, Robin goes back to the real world. | |
| Robin: | Dude. |
| Robin gets an incoming emergency call. | |
| Robin: | Sorry. It's my day off. |
| Robin ignores the call, as he has finally achieved relaxation. Unfortunately, Starfire, Raven, and Cyborg are caught in the clutches of the tentacle monster, immediately regretting their decision to put Robin on hiatus. | |
| Starfire: | Robin, we need you! |
| Raven: | Answer your communicator. |
| Cyborg: | Why is Beast Boy just sitting there? Help! |
| Beast Boy is absent, having left a green-painted bird to fill in his super hero obligations which doesn't help at all. |